Ok, so, here it goes.
I have a confession.
I have been totally terrified for the last year to be myself, completely. I am inching back into the territory of the brave, and I am asking you to bear witness.
A year ago, I stood on a precipice of magnificence. I created a Grief Workshop for a huge grief conference, putting together a complete proposal with learning objectives (had to learn how to write those!), experiential learning tools, a curriculum vitae, guest speakers, and all kinds of other fancy stuff. In a matter of weeks, I did it. From start to finish, this task pushed me far beyond my limits and past them – and when I was done, I had something, complete, and, well, GOOD.
See, one of fatal flaws is I’m great at start things, notsomuch at finishing them. But, this time, I finished something. I did! I was brave, and made phone calls and asked people to help me, and they did! They wanted to! They wanted to help ME, help others! I showed people who I considered much further advanced in my field of bravery (LOL) my true heart, my passion, my truth…and you know what they said?
“This is work that needs to be done.”
“Yes, this needs to be shared.”
“Whether you’re accepted to this conference or not, I will support you and help you in doing this work.”
You see, I have something in me, that has come out of all this craptastic schiznit the last few years…and it’s amazing, I know it. It could change my life, it could change your life, it could change the world in so many ways, great and small. It’s a sort-of system that has unfolded before me for dealing with negative emotions and life challenges, big and small. In my view, it could be a missing piece in the GREAT BIG puzzle of life in so many ways.
I never felt so alive as when I was creating this workshop, and I made so many brave choices. But, then, I got scared again, and I crawled back into my turtle shell, had a really shitty year that I let push me further into the oblivion of my own shell, and I didn’t do a damn thing with that amazing thing I did.
So, life, as it often does, handed me some more lemons (pardon the ole’ cliche) again, and said, “Neener, neener, Megan, what are you going to do with these ones?” It’s like Maya Angelou’s famous quote, “When you know better, you do better.” It took me a little longer than I’d like to admit, but this time, I knew what to do, and soon enough, I did finally start crushing and churning those lemons. As I did, another piece – maybe the final piece of the puzzle – emerged. I realized this little egg I’ve been sitting on, that I’m dying to hatch and share with you in the form of books, talks, workshops, blogs & more is not just about grief. I’ve realized it’s actually just about life. Period. It applies to every single person on this Earth. It can help you find joy in tragedy, or in the mundane, it can help you embrace sorrow as equally as bliss, it can help you discover your life’s purpose, it can help you face your fears and pain, it can help you be a more joyful parent, wife, friend, lover, partner, human. It is already helped me do all these.
And I think I’ve figured out, that if I don’t do this…I will die. Seriously, I will self-implode. I may not die today or tomorrow, or even 10 years from now, but every day that I continue to live in fear of being brave and vulnerable, of being willing to try and fail…every one of those days, a slow poison will be eating away at me inside – the poison of not expressing my magnificence.
So, I’ve decided that STEP ONE of my new post-Anita-Moorjani “living fearlessly” attitude-in-action is to create some accountability for myself, and garner your support. So, if you would like to see me hatch this egg and start speaking on the beautiful lessons I’ve learned the last few years, to help others live more joyful, fearless lives, would you like this post or comment on it, and tell me?! I’d like to know, would you come to one of my presentations? Would you buy a short e-book that would give you specific steps and tools you can incorporate into your daily life to help you deal with life’s challenges – to help you learn how to accept yourself and your life as it is, while also opening up that connection to the Divine and expressing all your amazing magnificence?
If the answer is yes, then please share below.
Then, do me a favor, and come back in a week, and ask me what I’m doing about it, before the Universe hands me more lemons to squeeze again, will ya?!